Australian Adventure #7 - Broken Toes

February 17, 2015

I write this on codine.

 

I am spending this afternoon in my flat getting better aquainted with my new best friends for the next few weeks: Crutch 1 and Crutch 2. I'm now going to have the henchest arms in Adelaide.

 

Guess which goon chose to be all clumsy and break all their toes bar one on their right foot? That's right. Me. WAHAY.

 

I blame having too much fun on the beach with Demi Lardner yesterday. In celebration of the lovely comedian Gorden Southern and his birthday, a large collection of comics and performers got drunk and played cricket by the beach. Demi and I alongside a few other comics all ran head first into the sea, diving under the waves and all pretending to be Ariel the Little Mermaid** The waves were so strong and within a few steps we were all heavilly covered by the salt water. In comparison to the UK I cannot get over how hot the sea is here and how clear the water is!

 

However, as we were running across the sand into the water, a very well hidden rock in the sand caught my foot at such an angle that my foot in a period of 12 hours slowly transformed into a huge black genital-wart-esque beast. I wasn't really aware it was broken until this morning, I spent all of last night hobbling around Adelaide thinking I was being a complete wimp. I even performed on stage at The Howling Owl in heels.


Thanks to all the gang at Adelaide A&E. Unlike the UK I was seen within 15 minutes as there was only THREE POEPLE in the emergency room. THREE PEOPLE. Can you imagine? I had THE BEST morning with all the girls. Swapped numbers with the Radiographer mid-XRay and we're going out tomorrow, and Fay and the nurses have booked tickets to see my show after we chatted about feminism. It was like a really friendly episode of E.R.
 

The plan today is to watch a few shows at The Producers before and after mine before seeing Bryony Kimming's show SEX IDIOT (check her out). There are so many talented acts here. 

 

Other than that, the other major highlight of the last 24 hours is that I've seen a man walk a cat on a leash.

 

Should probably go now, my show is on in 5 hours and I need to work out how I can do the opening strip tease in a space costume with only one working foot and two crutches......

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**complete lie, it was just me. 

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© 2014 by ELF LYONS