Elf's Diary Entry #4 - One ill foot and a powdery room….

January 4, 2015

Day Three of 2015!

 

Today has been a productive day of mini victories and bizarre losses*

 

One mild downer is I am heading to bed with a right foot which looks half broken & half zombie. Without shocking you with a photo it is very much the colour of an old dogs tongue. Who knew trying to mimic the dancing of the lead singer of Future Islands could be so dangerous?  I assume that's the reason.... and not that I am actually turning into a zombie... (that would be so time-consuming).

 

Despite the visual aggressivness off my foot my happiness stems from a series of enjoyable littler discoveries. The first being Future Island's stonking new album and my realisation that there is NOTHING sexier than the way Mark Ronson bobs his head up & down in the new Uptown Funk video .  After watching his TED talk I am now very keen to find him and ask him if wants to hang out, share a Ferroro Roche or go fishing**. I don't know how I will achieve this, but 2015 is the year of positivity and wishful thinking.

 

Alongside musical discoveries today was spent drinking black coffee and catching up on letters, writing to my pen-pal,(a talented actress who I have never met but through the beauty of the internet I now exchange monthly letters with), and enjoying the company of comedian Amy Howerska in Camden.  Far more grown up and in control of her life than I, I look up to Amy in a similiar way to the way Robin probably looks up to Batman**. Amy is FAR more approachable than Batman though - this must be made very clear. I also started to fall in love too with the words of Alain de Botton in his book 'The Consolations of Philosophy', a book my little brother lent me becauase he believed it may make me 'smarter like him'. Thanks Lil G.

 

The afternoon was spent watching Space Jam. Dear god. I watched it with actor friend Gethin Alderman (he knows too many words to this film). The film, if you haven’t seen it, is too complicated to explain but includes the most unneccessary Bill Murray cameo and 'hero' Bugs Bunny is a massive male chauvinist rabbit and is questionably creepy. Goodness knows what we were thinking making him a kids character.

 

YET - the most important moment and achievement of today is the final discovery I made at 7pm. I calculated it was too much for me to order a Haze Machine for the opening of my show ‘Being Barbarella’....

 

This was a sad discovery as lots of my choregraphy has relied on this machine being used to generate a fog affect. HOWEVER one MUST be inventive and not hold back... So, DID I GIVE UP? NO. DID I BUY A HAZE MACHINE? NO.

 

DID I after an hour of experimentation and a wise £3 spent in Superdrug LEARN that WHO needs a Haze machine when all you REALLY need is three large bottles of Johnson’s Baby Powder and a very strong grip?  YES. Yes I did.

This may have led to a mild mental breakdown and a ridiculous amount of vaccumming in the confines of my bedroom, but the discovery has saved me approxmately £100 on hire fees, lighting fluid and a hefty health & safety risk assessment. This breakthrough definitely deserved a celebratory dance.....

 

Which brings me onto why I should probably go to hospital about this foot...

 

* I shant go into the losses, all you really need to know is that I am terrible at Poker and Monopoly 

***These are hobbies which I believe to be incredibly emotionally, physically and mentally stimulating and I refuse to believe that no one could not enjoy these elements. 

*** I haven’t read that much Batman. 

 

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© 2014 by ELF LYONS