It's 23:40pm, I'm listening to 'Back in the Tall Grass' by Future Islands and the zombie foot is still going strong with the 'I'm about to deteriote and drop-off your body' kind-of-look. Very sexy. I'm also wearing Flannel Pyjamas. The type of pyjamas that scream 'CELIBACY'. These pyjamas conflict very nicely with the new array of garments I received from ASOS today - garments which Kim Kardashian and Pamela Anderson would probably high-five me for and also the type of garments that if I stand too close to a candle or powerful lighting I will literally look 'smokin' in. Who doesn't love Polyester eh?.
Anyways, the Fairy lights are on, the vanilla candle is lit, and bedtime is almost upon me. My eyelids have got that satisfying weight to them suggesting that a heavy sleep is on the cards. The fact I've achieved all of today's 'to-does' makes me feel very fulfilled. I celebrated in style an hour ago by having the company of amiable eccentric and great lover of philosophizing, Josiah Norris, in my flat for Magnum icecreams, non-alchoholic beer and discussions about Socrates to the background music of St Vincent. He helped me with my 'tech' (I use the word INCREDIBLY loosely) for tonight's preview of Being Barbarella at the Camden Comedy Club tonight. It was a show, which, despite how much I was panicking and feeling borderline nauseous about at 2pm this afternoon, I now feel incredibly excited and happy with. I am greatly satisfied with the jokes that worked and the lessons I learnt from the jokes that still need finessing (I'm too stubborn to say a joke 'doesn't' work). It wasn't a perfect show by any means (and bloody hell it shouldnt be as 1) it's only January and 2) this is the fourth time I've done half the material and the narrative) but the show has solid wheels. I need to remember that it is all about keeping confident, keeping afloat and remembering that you are entirely in charge of how the show goes! You are only as good as you choose to be - You are a STRONG POWERFUL INDEPENDENT WOMAN GODDAMIT!
(It's at this point in the blog I ask if you can guess who has been reading self-help books.....
just A LOT of Celine Dion)
Overall, I was abit shy on stage. Reason being most of the material is still very personal, reflective and green. I am still finding a comfortable way of easing myself into the Barbarella persona of being THE MOST SEXY WOMAN IN THE ROOM, (we will get there eventually with the aid of my flammable polysester wardrobe), and balancing alongside the intimate message at the end. It's a sincere show. By February for VAULT most of the jokes will have welded themselves together more comfortably and the stories will flow naturally from my throat rather than like stalling surprises as they currently sound now. 'It will all come with time. No need to panic' my inner voice soothes!
Thus, to conclude, today has been quite simply a very satisfying and pleasurable day. I achieved an important deal and it feels nice to reflect on the first day of the week in a sober and positive manner. I haven't written about it all, another time perhaps. Who knew waking up at 7am would make a day better? Make it LONGER? Days are LONGER if you wake up earlier? I'm extending my life through a few simple steps. Not drinking + Waking up early = instant pleasure.